Badtux the Snarky Penguin

In a time of chimpanzees, I was a penguin.

Religious fundamentalists are motivated by the sneaking suspicion that someone, somewhere, is having fun -- and that this must be stopped.

Monday, June 27, 2005

Are there call centers in Hell?

Pope Horatio Tyrannosaurus Nixon Rex of the Church of Nixon Incarnate notes that Texas appears to be about to be annexed by Hell, noting that most Texans probably won't notice any difference anyhow. Toxic fumes? Check. Fiery weather? Check. Unbreathable air? Check. Water that burns the throat going down and rots out your gut once it gets to the bottom? Check.

Which brings up the question of, if Hell is like Texas (and vice-versa), are there call centers in Hell? My suspicion is that the answer to that question is, why, YES! You must admit that it explains a few things, such as the vague smell of brimstone when you connect to a computer manufacturer's technical support hotline, or that the directions you get from the technical support person appear to be in Modern Demonic rather than in plain English...

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Posted by: BadTux / 6/27/2005 05:01:00 PM

Comments:

heh heh heh - funny post - and, "Pope Horatio Tyrannosaurus Nixon Rex of the Church of Nixon Incarnate" and you make a good point.. I guess TX is being annexed by hell! That's nice to know.. now I won't plan on visiting TX.
# posted by oldwhitelady : 27/6/05 10:44 PM

That's strange. Every time *I* call tech support, it's like I'm talking to the old Indian guy in "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom". Not that it matters, though: we all know outsourcing is "good" for the economy.
# posted by andrew : 28/6/05 3:17 AM

(Typical tech support call to Texas)

ME: Hi, yes, one of the computers we purchases from you has a faulty video card. I switched it out with a card in another compu-

TECH SUPPORT: OH GOD! IT BURNS! IT BURRRNS!!! AHHHHHH!!!

ME: Um, ok, but if you could just send us another video card I can pop it in the-

TECH SUPPORT: AHHH, NO! DON'T PUT THAT THING ON ME!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!! OH GOD, WHY DID I HAVE TO MOVE TO TEXAS??!?!?? AHHHHH-

(Call ends abruptly)
# posted by Pope Horatio Tyrannosaurus Nixon Rex : 28/6/05 9:24 AM

Pope, you shouldn't have bought a Dell!
# posted by BadTux : 28/6/05 12:46 PM

FYI, the Biblical Arts Center in Dallas is on fire as of this posting. Just sayin . . .
# posted by Fixer : 28/6/05 1:37 PM

Honor Roll

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"Keep fighting for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce." -- Molly Ivins, 1944-2007

"The penalty good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men."

-- Plato

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