Badtux the Snarky Penguin

In a time of chimpanzees, I was a penguin.

Religious fundamentalists are motivated by the sneaking suspicion that someone, somewhere, is having fun -- and that this must be stopped.

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

Driver problems

Well, as promised, yesterday a) the maintenance guy came and swapped out my kitchen faucet, and b) I signed the lease renewal on my current iceberg dock. Ah well.

The following EMAIL was sent by an engineer to a techical support person. Names have been changed to protect the guilty.

The problem is that the MAC filter in the network chip is not being properly programmed by the driver under certain circumstances, thus cutting off traffic because the MAC filter is set up for a MAC that our software isn't listening for anymore (generally the original hardware MAC). The purpose of the hardware MAC filter in the network chip is to reduce the number of network interrupts coming into the system to improve system performance, but in this case it's reducing it to zero! I know that version 1.0.1 had the issue. I *believe* it was fixed for 1.0.2, but Abel was the person formally responsible for the fix and Baker or Charlie would have done the code review on the fix and thus know what release it made it into, I'll need to check to make sure. Anyhow, tcpdump "wakes it up" because tcpdump turns off the MAC filter by placing the network driver into promiscuous mode. This "works", but kills system performance.

If you have the 1.0.2 release notes handy you might want to take a look at them. I will be in the office in an hour or so depending upon what the crazy automobile drivers are doing (I looked outside and the road is wet so there may be freeway clogs) and if the 1.0.2 release notes do not answer your question I will be able to verify for certain whether the fix made it into 1.0.2 via looking at the CVS change logs. Hmm, yes, the freeways have driver problems too. Unfortunately the freeway driver problem isn't fixable with a driver fix, unless you consider forced sterilization of bad drivers via branding iron prior to reproduction to be a "hot fix", which unfortunately has a very long debug cycle time to verify the proper operation of the hot fix and thus isn't feasible no matter how attractive a hot fix it appears on some mornings.

Branding irons. Fixing bad drivers with. Prior to reproduction. I like!

-- Badtux the Bad-driver-hatin' Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 5/02/2007 09:25:00 AM  1 comments  

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

A sad and horrifying admission

In light of my mentor Jonathan Swift's horrifying tale of a child behaving badly, I have my own sad and horrifying admission to make. I have done a bad thing. I, I, I... YELLED AT MY CAT.

Yes, my cat. A fluffy innocent kitty that had done nothing wrong except jump up on my computer desk and walk in front of my computer screen and mew pitiably to be petted, as cats are wont to do when their human is not properly worshipping them. But I was too busy, too inconsiderate, too, too... HUMAN... and I yelled at the cat instead, calling him bad names for getting in my way while I was trying to work on my computer. I even picked him up and set him down behind my chair! Sob! Can you ever forgive me? I have damaged my poor kitty for life. Oh I feel so ASHAMED...

-- Badtux the Abashed Penguin My poor innocent victim asks, "Why, daddy? Why?"...

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Posted by: BadTux / 4/24/2007 01:53:00 PM  13 comments  

Monday, April 23, 2007

Weeds of Mass Destruction

niCk (Mem Beth) suggests legalizing growing marijuana for your own consumption since it's a victimless crime.

Silly niCK. Marijuana makes you feel good. If it makes you feel good, it must be Satan's handiwork, like dancing and women wearing pants. Worse yet, it's a method of feeling good that doesn't require sending large sums of money to Big Pharma for Happy Happy Pills, since it is literally a weed that you can grow on your own on your back porch. Big Pharma employs hundreds of thousands of people and pays hundreds of millions of dollars of bribe money to politicians every year. So not only would legalizing marijuana be doing Satan's work, but it would also hurt dozens of hard-working legislators who would have to work for a living instead of live off the Big Pharma payroll, it would hurt dozens of millionaire Big Pharma executives who'd lose a few thousand dollars of their bonus money, but most importantly, it'd hurt all the regular working people who work for Big Pharma, who would lose a few cents off their paychecks if Big Pharma could no longer sell Happy Happy Pills by the bucketload.

Knowing all that, I have just one question for you, niCK: Why do you hate America?

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 4/23/2007 07:58:00 PM  10 comments  

Friday, April 20, 2007

Evil Spock's lover

Evil Spock is an evil Vulcan who occasionally wanders by. While browsing around in the intertubes I found his perfect lover: Evil Spock, if you come wandering by, this penguin has your perfect mate for you!

-- Badtux the Matchmaking Penguin


Posted by: BadTux / 4/20/2007 09:29:00 PM  8 comments  

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

I asked for it...

EMAIL correspondence, re: KLR seats, after I complained that the stock OEM seat was comfortable except for the fact that it's slanted so that I'm always sliding down the slope into the tank, with resulting discomfort (eek!):

Tomcat wrote:
> I have ridden 1100 miles in one day on original seat without a lot of
> discomfort. You are on a motorcycle you are suppose to feel pain. TC
Indeed, I've ridden multiple 500+ mile days on the original seat with no real issues other than getting tired of my nutsack getting crunched against the gas tank (grin!). I suppose if you have smaller balls, that's not an issue. (Okay, I'll go to my corner now :-) .

Tomcat replied back:

I know what you mean Badtux I have already replaced three fuel tanks where my balls slammed into the tank leaving BIG impressions. Got to go. TC

I gotta admit it. Tomcat *owned* me on this one. I asked for it tho!

-- Badtux the out-balled Penguin
Hold it, penguins have cloaca, don't they?!

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Posted by: BadTux / 3/27/2007 09:07:00 PM  2 comments  

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Ann Coulter vs. Michelle Malkin

Who is more popular?

Thus far, I've gotten 14 Google hits for Ann Coulter Nude, and only 2(two) Google hits for Michelle Malkin Nude. Does this mean that Man Coulter is 7 times more popular than Michelle Malkin? Or does it merely mean that people are curious to see what sexual organs Man Coulter possesses between his/her legs? Curious penguins want to know!

-- Badtux the Curious Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 3/21/2007 02:51:00 PM  6 comments  

Wednesday, March 14, 2007


Naked pictures of Ann Coulter are NOT located here. This is just a test to see whether I get lots of Google hits from perverts looking for nude pictures of Ann Coulter. Heck, let's throw in Michelle Malkin too. Don't get your nude pictures of Michelle Malkin here! Michelle Malkin nude pictures! Ann Coulter nude pictures! Everything not here!

What are you, some kinda *sicko* lookin' fer that kinda stuff here?!

-- Badtux the Hit-whoring Penguin
Not     Not
Ann Coulter Nude     Michelle Malkin Nude

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Posted by: BadTux / 3/14/2007 01:55:00 PM  16 comments  

Monday, March 12, 2007

Spring forward

This is the time of year where it is always a PITA to reset the clocks on the VCR, microwave, stove, stereo, etc. However, last fall I had a nifty idea: Why bother resetting those clocks? Since most of the year is spent on DST nowdays, why not just leave them set to DST? Just remember when I looked at them that they were an hour ahead!

So now all the clocks in my house all say the correct time again, and I didn't have to do a thing! No digging for the microwave manual and the stove manual and the stereo manual and etc. to figure out how to reset those clocks, just leave'em alone and presto!

Am I a genius, or what?

-- Badtux the Practical Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 3/12/2007 02:42:00 PM  8 comments  

Sunday, March 11, 2007

To the folks in the next apartment over

If you're going to have loud energetic sex at 12:30am, could you at least move your bed away from the wall so it isn't going bump bump bump bump bump against the wall behind my head?

Thank you, this has been a public service from your neighbor the penguin.

-- Badtux the Woken Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 3/11/2007 12:32:00 AM  9 comments  

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Clashing styles

Unintentionally hilarious headline: "Brazil police clash with protesters demonstrating against Bush visit".

Uhm, yeah. Hasn't anybody ever told the Brazil police that blue-grey really, really does NOT go with green and yellow? The Brazil police need to get those Queer Eye guys to come in and give them a fashion makeover, sheesh! Although I must admit that the jaunty beret certainly gives this fine example of Brazil police-dom a rather dashing look, wot? But what's with the motorcycle helmet worn by the cop in the background? Quite unfashionable, that!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 3/10/2007 12:18:00 AM  3 comments  

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

The Gay Penguin Conspiracy

OMG, The Gay Agenda got my cousin Tux!

- Badtux the "They're getting personal, now!" Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 3/07/2007 08:17:00 PM  5 comments  

Gay Agenda sighting!

Yes, that mighty supervillain The Gay Agenda, with his Gay Ray Gun of Gayness that he is going to use to shoot all our masculine boys and feminine girls and turn them into girly-men and manly girls, has been sighted AGAIN by those brave patriots of the Christian News Service, who, braving the risks of carpal tunnel syndrome or being affected by stray Gay Rays shot from the Gay Agenda's Gay Ray Gun, bravely read an AP news article about a speech at a gay rights convention! And now we find out that The Gay Agenda has a boss: Hillary Rodham Clinton, who, these brave patriots tell us, is running as the first gay President (gasp!). Well, I guess since her husband ran for office as the first black President there is a precedent... still, who would have thunk it that The Gay Agenda had a female boss? This penguin is aghast, aghast I say! Oh Gay Agenda, how could you have let us manly men err penguins down like that?!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 3/07/2007 04:40:00 PM  3 comments  

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Gay Agenda sighting in Rhode Island

A Catholic bishop in Rhode Island has taken time from gay-raping little boys and forcing women to have babies to note in alarm that the mighty supervillain The Gay Agenda (left) has shot Rhode Island Attorney General Patrick Lynch with his Gay Ray Gun of Gayness, forcing A.G. Lynch to rule that (gasp) gays should have equal rights under the Establishment clause of the Constitution rather than be stoned to death. Why, if gays had equal rights, they would... they would... CUT OUR HAIR AND DECORATE OUR HOMES MOST TASTEFULLY! What would the makers of knotty pine furniture do then, I ask you? Think of their innocent little children, starving amongst a sea of knotty pine furniture in Cooterville Alabama. Oh the horror!

So remember boys and girls, keep an eye out for that mighty supervillain The Gay Agenda flying across your sky clad in his gay little short-shorts and perfectly coifed permed hair, because if he got his way, why, we'd all be gayer than the gay mayor of gayville and the children of the makers of knotty pine furniture would be reduced to eating sawdust for breakfast lunch and dinner. Think of the children! Oh the poor little children!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 2/28/2007 08:21:00 AM  3 comments  

Sunday, February 25, 2007

The Gay Agenda according to World Nut Daily

Left: The Gay Agenda as depicted by L>T:

That mighty supervillain The Gay Agenda gets a lot of press on World Nut Daily ("A free press for a free people", for some value of "free"). A quick Google search of World Nut Daily turns up over 500 articles published there about that horrible supervillain.

So what is so horrible about The Gay Agenda, he of the iridescent tights, rainbow cape, big "G" on his chest, and his Gay Ray Gun of Gayness that he carries between his legs as he flies through the skies Superman-style? Well, clicking through some of the search results turns up some interesting facts about The Gay Agenda:

The Gay Agenda wants to be taught in elementary schools. Now, I know what you're saying -- why does a big lunk in tights, with that, err, suggestive ray gun, want to sit all akimber in one of those little 4th grade seats learning his multiplication tables along with little kids? Well, I'm not sure, but The Gay Agenda apparently went to court to make sure he got taught in elementary schools.

The Gay Agenda wants to adopt little boys and girls and use them for child sacrifices. Many states have had to actually pass LAWS prohibiting The Gay Agenda from adopting little boys and girls in their states! C'mon, the notion of some evil supervillain in tights adopting a small child ought to raise a few questions, eh?

The Gay Agenda goes around looking for pregnant girls, and when he finds one, he rips the fetus right out of her belly (this is called "Plan B", I suppose "Plan A" would be to take the girl to a normal abortion clinic). Then The Gay Agenda eats the aborted fetus as it wriggles in his rainbow-gloved hands. Once finished eating the aborted fetus, The Gay Agenda then uses the Gay Ray Gun of Gayness to force the girl to gay-marry another girl, or maybe Senator Santorum's dog or Senator Cornyn's box turtle depending on his mood.

The Gay Agenda has super-powered breath that contains Super AIDS. All that The Gay Agenda has to do is breathe on someone and that person gets AIDS. It is unknown whether this super-power is related to Rush Limbaugh's breath, which merely reeks of brimstone and reduces the IQ of anyone subjected to it by 50 points.

The Gay Agenda sneaks up on loving families at night and holds a knife to the throat of the woman and forces them to divorce and gay-marry other people and forces the children to be sad and kill themselves.

The Gay Agenda wants to put all straight people in jail, or kill them if he can't jail them.

The Gay Agenda sneaks into unsuspecting households at night, kidnaps the children, and makes them watch X-rated movies. It is unknow what The Gay Agenda's motivation for doing this is. Perhaps he is lonely and just wants company. In any event, it is clear that The Gay Agenda is a bad, bad man.

The Gay Agenda wants to marry a sheep. In other news, half of the state of Wyoming and most of the country of New Zealand goes "Ewe!".

The Gay Agenda sneaks into homes at night and replaces Bibles with Qurans, then takes the Bibles and rips the pages out to use as toilet paper. The Gay Agenda apparently has irritable bowel syndrome.

The Gay Agenda sneaks into military recruiting stations and shoots the new recruits with his Gay Ray Beam of Gayness and turns them all into swishy boys and manly girls.

The Gay Agenda invades churches and forces preachers at gunpoint to preach to The Gay Agenda. It is unknown what joy he gets from doing this. I guess being an evil supervillain means never having to explain your evil-ness.

The Gay Agenda forces nations that tolerate his presence, like Canada and the Netherlands, to be unlivable hellholes, while nations that shoot at The Gay Agenda at sight, like Saudi Arabia, Egypt, and Iran, are beautiful paradises.

Boy, I sure learn a lot about The Gay Agenda by reading World Nut Daily. The Gay Agenda is truly an evil supervillain!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 2/25/2007 08:36:00 PM  3 comments  

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Beware Teh Gay!

Wingnut Daily has noticed that the Army is cheating disabled troops in order to hold down costs. Wow. Just wow. Wingnut Daily. Posting a story critical of Dear Leader and His holy annointed administration. The rats truly are jumping off the ship.

Meanwhile, at the bottom of that story, I see a fascinating link: "Massachusetts judge orders teaching of the Gay Agenda". Oh dear. There's that evil supervillain, The Gay Agenda, again, with his rainbow cape and the big "G" on his chest, and the Gay Ray Gun of Gayness that he uses to shoot unsuspecting boys and girls to make them Teh Gay. I guess that, as an evil supervillain, the schools turned him away earlier in life. Perhaps he would not have become a supervillain if those nasty schools had allowed him to be taught. I am glad that a Massachussets judge now is going to allow The Gay Agenda to attend school. Teaching The Gay Agenda, though, probably is going to be a bit difficult for the teacher. I mean, c'mon. Here you are, with all these little shrimpy 4th graders, then there's this big lunk wearing tights and a rainbow cape, with a big Gay Ray Gun of Gayness clutched between his legs? And you think that won't be disruptive to the learning of the other students in the class?!

No, sadly I must agree with Wingnut Daily here. Teaching The Gay Agenda in a normal classroom is just too disruptive to the learning of our students. Besides, if we allow The Gay Agenda to be taught in a regular classroom, what next? The Joker sues for admission to Gotham University? Lex Luthor requests admission to Metropolis High School? Dr. Doom demands admission to Oklahoma State? Supervillains wearing tights, alas, simply are not appropriate as students in our classrooms.

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

PS: C'mon, people, I've had *ZERO* submissions for pictures of The Gay Agenda, it'd be *great* to tag these posts about that mighty supervillian with a picture of him so that wingnuts can know what they're supposed to be shuddering in fear in their homes about! Flippers, guys. Penguins have flippers. We aren't good artists, okay?!

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Posted by: BadTux / 2/24/2007 08:43:00 PM  6 comments  

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Loser of the day

I don't know who is the bigger loser, the dude who turned up the volume on a porn movie so loud that his neighbors could hear the porn star screaming and moaning, or the dude who grabbed a sword and went on a rescue mission to save the lady who was screaming upstairs, breaking in the first dude's door and waving the sword around as he looked for the woman in trouble.

Awe what the heck. Let's make it a tie. They're BOTH Losers of the Day.

-- Badtux the Amazed Penguin

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Posted by: BadTux / 2/22/2007 02:55:00 PM  10 comments  

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Happy Valentine's Day from the Bush Administration

That is all.

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Courtesy of Dependable Renegade

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Posted by: BadTux / 2/14/2007 08:09:00 PM  3 comments  
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Name: BadTux
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I am a black and white and yellow multicolored penguin making his way as best he can in a world of monochromic monkeys.

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Bill Richardson: Because what America needs is a competent fat man with bad hair as President (haven't we had enough incompetent pretty faces?)

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"Keep fighting for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce." -- Molly Ivins, 1944-2007 "The penalty good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men."

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