Badtux the Snarky Penguin

In a time of chimpanzees, I was a penguin.

Religious fundamentalists are motivated by the sneaking suspicion that someone, somewhere, is having fun -- and that this must be stopped.

Monday, January 01, 2007

Christ says, "Carry heat"

For it says in the Gospel of Jesus as recorded by World Nut Daily, "Verily, verily, I say unto you, that you cannot follow me unless you're carrying heat." Right next to the passage that says "thou shalt smite the sand niggers and other darkies, and if a man should slap one cheek, why, you should blow him away."

Boy, I'm glad we have World Nut Daily to tell us about things like this!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Posted by: BadTux / 1/01/2007 10:46:00 PM

Comments:

What did Jesus say about shooting bad drivers?
# posted by Malnurtured Snay : 2/1/07 5:52 AM

Happy New Year.

I hear it is OK to kill people who are in custody all ready and can't kill any one else because Jesus love revenge.
# posted by Ole Blue The Heretic : 2/1/07 11:15 AM

Snay, I think Jesus said something like "Fuck up their day with a RPG if they're driving 50mph in the fast lane!" or somethin' like that, if the Gospel of World Nut Daily is correct. And yeah, Blue, Jesus said "It's okay to kill 70 year old dudes 'cause, like, they're nasty 'n' stuff." I'm sure it's in the Bible somewhere. I read it on World Nut Daily, after all.

Remember, Jesus was a militia nut, who went Rambo on the Romans and mounted Pontius Pilate on a cross after Pontius dissed him. 'Nuff said.

- Badtux the Bible Scholar Penguin
# posted by BadTux : 2/1/07 3:11 PM

Just clicking thru to that site made me puke, however, I do believe in the right to keep and arm bears.

d.
# posted by deuddersun : 4/1/07 6:35 AM

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"Keep fighting for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce." -- Molly Ivins, 1944-2007

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