Badtux the Snarky Penguin

In a time of chimpanzees, I was a penguin.

Religious fundamentalists are motivated by the sneaking suspicion that someone, somewhere, is having fun -- and that this must be stopped.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Time to start killing automobile drivers!

A wingnut writes to the local paper: "I refuse to cower in fear of terrorists. We must torture or kill however many people it takes to make us safe!"

Now, as a motorcyclist, I'm far more likely to get killed by an automobile driver than by a terrorist. Every time I mount my bike, I shudder at the thought of broken bones or worse when some cowardly automobile driver hits me while talking on his cell phone while shaving while yelling at the kids in the back seat. Therefore, by his logic, we motorcyclists should kill as many automobile drivers as necessary to make us safe. Neca eos omnes. Deus suos agnoscet.

That is all.

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Posted by: BadTux / 9/18/2006 03:53:00 PM

Comments:

The words that struck me where "Every time I mount my bike."

My, my, what are you doing over there? LOL
# posted by BBC : 18/9/06 6:51 PM

Which local paper? I thought "The Contra Costa Times" sucked, but your local waste of pulp must outclass mine.
# posted by TheCultureGhost : 18/9/06 7:53 PM

Please be careful, just lost my neighbor this w/e in a motorcycle accident.

I'm still sad.
# posted by Debra : 18/9/06 8:03 PM

The Murky News is published by the same folks who publish the "Contra Costa Times". I dunno why I continue subscribing to the Murky.

BBC, yeah, you mount a bike just like you mount a horse. Thus "Mounties". Makes me wonder what them cowboys were doing when they wasn't watchin' them cows. Well hell, any of us who ever saw "Brokeback Mountain" knows what they was doin'...

-- BT
# posted by BadTux : 18/9/06 8:13 PM

I jumped for the saddle, the saddle wasn't there, rammed nine inches up the old grey mare. Come a tie my pecker to a tree, come a tie my pecker to a tree. LOL
# posted by BBC : 18/9/06 8:25 PM

Hey, what happened to our buddy at http://bassemmroue.blogspot.com/

No post since the 3rd.
# posted by BBC : 18/9/06 8:27 PM

Will drivers who try to look out for bikes and give them a little extra space merely be thrown in secret prisons?
# posted by NewsBlog 5000 : 18/9/06 8:45 PM

I don't subscribe to the CC Times; if I feel the occasional need to scan I do so at the school library.
Wouldn't want to encourage them to thinking their readership was increasing.
# posted by TheCultureGhost : 18/9/06 9:11 PM

The problem soccer moms and country club dads who drive oversized gas-guzzlers because their status symbols are more important to them than their financial stability. They have the wheel in one hand, a cell phone in the second hand, a coffee mug in the third hand, they're changing radio stations with their fourth hand, and they're pointing threateningly at their 3.7 loud, whiny kids in the back seat fighting over an iPod with their fifth hand. I do mot of my travelling on foot, and these assholes can do an eon in purgatory for all I care.

I've held my own for many years against these scatterbrained suburbanites. One day, the way things are going, I'm gonna get plowed. If that driver is very lucky, I'll die on the spot. Otherwise, I'm gonna be one well-to-do cripple...
# posted by Mimus Pauly : 19/9/06 6:40 AM

you notice how alot of those oversized- gas guzzlers kinda remind one of military tanks or monster trucks? if you drive something puny it's a little intimadating. of couse they feel they can talk on the cell or slap the kids around they aren't the ones going to die.
# posted by L>T : 19/9/06 7:46 AM

Dear Badtux thanks for the ivtro the BBC. Sounds like my kinda guy. Pablo
# posted by Anonymous : 19/9/06 8:18 AM

Automobiles kill more people than terrorist every year. I say let us get back to the good ole days just like the wing nuts want us to get back to and all ride horses.

Hey at least fuel is cheap for horses. And women love horses more than cars so they will take care of them better.

Also, we can all live in smaller communities so that all the people around us are all the same.

*sarcasm off*
# posted by Ole Blue The Heretic : 19/9/06 9:11 AM

does anybody else pine for the halcyon days when sex was fun and motorcyles were dangerous?
# posted by The Minstrel Boy : 19/9/06 9:32 AM

It it's too big to park, it's too big to drive. Most of these people aim for their destination and that is their idea of driving.

Aargh!
# posted by Debra : 19/9/06 11:51 AM

Murky News is very murky indeed.
# posted by The Heretik : 19/9/06 4:54 PM

I'm not sure monkeys should be driving anyway, our minds are always somewhere else and we don't always see what is ahead of us.

I've been lucky over the years, but I'm sure it's just luck that I've never been in a bad wreck.
# posted by BBC : 19/9/06 5:16 PM

Honor Roll

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Liberated Iraqis

Children celebrate liberation of parents
More pics of children celebrating
Liberated baby
Liberated women and children
More liberation, yessiree
More to follow, after I finish cursing SOB chickenhawks and get my breath back...

"Keep fighting for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce." -- Molly Ivins, 1944-2007

"The penalty good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men."

-- Plato

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