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Badtux the Snarky PenguinIn a time of chimpanzees, I was a penguin. Religious fundamentalists are motivated by the sneaking suspicion that someone, somewhere, is having fun -- and that this must be stopped. |
Sunday, July 10, 2005The press is the enemy in IraqThey keep tell us about all those, like, bombs and stuff, that are going off all over the place, and about that rat-tat-tat of gunfire that goes on almost 24 hours a day. But never fear. Our brave men (and token women) in the Bush Administration have a plan: arrest journalists and detain them indefinitely if they dare try to report from Iraq.Yessiree, definitely a plan! Now, the question is how many journalists are the Americans holding in their gulags in Iraq? We don't know. The military won't tell us, saying that it's a "national security secret". Apparently if the insurgents find out how many journalists we're holding in our gulags, why, it'll make them suddenly become stronger, more accurate with their gunfire, and more deadly! Whereas keeping this secret, why, it just makes Ahab whose child was killed by a 500 pound bomb dropped from an F-16 on a house next door that supposedly had "insurgent leaders" in it just so dispirited that he'll just go right on home to his little tarp pitched in a corner of the rubble of his former house, trade in his AK-47 for an American flag, and start a pro-American parade. Uhm, except his child is still dead, so I guess that isn't happening. Oops! But that's okay, she's Gone to Jesus and is in Heaven and wasn't really a person anyhow, since she was a member of a different pride of monkeys and only monkeys that belong to our pride are actually real, all others are just enemy to hoot and whoop and fling feces at hooo hooo hooo HOOOOT!
Look at the monkey. Look at the silly monkey!
hooo hoo hoo HOOOT! - Badtux the Naked Ape Penguin Posted by: BadTux / 7/10/2005 07:05:00 PMComments:Don’t you know that only White American Protestants can get into heaven? As long as they excommunicate gay church members and vote Republican.# posted by NewsBlog 5000 : 10/7/05 8:34 PM
No, no, no. Only a very select group of folks are going to heaven to see Jeebus. But, for a marginal amount, Randall Terry can help you get on the list -- *if* you're really willing to go that 'extra mile' for God. |
About Me
I am a black and white and yellow multicolored penguin making his way as best he can in a world of monochromic monkeys. ArchivesApril 2004 / December 2004 / January 2005 / February 2005 / March 2005 / April 2005 / May 2005 / June 2005 / July 2005 / August 2005 / September 2005 / October 2005 / November 2005 / December 2005 / January 2006 / February 2006 / March 2006 / April 2006 / May 2006 / June 2006 / July 2006 / August 2006 / September 2006 / October 2006 / November 2006 / December 2006 / January 2007 / February 2007 / March 2007 / April 2007 / May 2007 / June 2007 / July 2007 / August 2007 /
Cost of the War in Iraq
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"Keep fighting for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce." -- Molly Ivins, 1944-2007
"The penalty good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men."
-- Plato
Are you a spammer? Then send mail to my spamtrack mailbox to get permenantly banned! Remember, that's iamstupid@badtux.org (hehehhe!).
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