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Badtux the Snarky PenguinIn a time of chimpanzees, I was a penguin. Religious fundamentalists are motivated by the sneaking suspicion that someone, somewhere, is having fun -- and that this must be stopped. |
Friday, March 18, 2005The War on Fun(tm) Continues: Baseball on TrialReligious conservatives have been at war against fun for hundreds of years, because fun is sinful. We're talking about the kind of folks who talk about "marital duty" and make sure to keep an image in their mind (like, say, Dick Cheney naked) so that they don't enjoy themselves too much whist doing their "marital duty" (and then wonder why they need Viagra to get it up).So they looked around, saw that people were enjoying themselves watching this "baseball" thing, and started immediately looking at this "baseball" thing looking for the evil... and... AHAH! They might be using DRUGS! Which are FUN! Which are thus EVIL! Which thus means we must use the full power of the State to squash it, even if the only person being harmed is the dude ruining his liver and shrivelling his testicles! Thank you, Congress, for ruining my enjoyment of baseball. Why, if you didn't hold McCarthy-style inquisitions ("Are you now, or have you ever, used performance-enhancing drugs?"), why, those baseball players could run amok and KILL US ALL! Boy, this Congressional action really makes this penguin feel safer, y'know? It sure is reassuring to know that the mighty Drug Warriors in Congress are protecting me from those evil baseball players... why, if Congress didn't protect me from those evil baseball players they might... they might... give me some entertaining sports to watch! GAH! The evil! The pure evil! (whimper!)
- Badtux the Snarky Penguin Posted by: BadTux / 3/18/2005 12:46:00 PMComments:Post a Comment<< Home |
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I am a black and white and yellow multicolored penguin making his way as best he can in a world of monochromic monkeys. ArchivesApril 2004 / December 2004 / January 2005 / February 2005 / March 2005 / April 2005 / May 2005 / June 2005 / July 2005 / August 2005 / September 2005 / October 2005 / November 2005 / December 2005 / January 2006 / February 2006 / March 2006 / April 2006 / May 2006 / June 2006 / July 2006 / August 2006 / September 2006 / October 2006 / November 2006 / December 2006 / January 2007 / February 2007 / March 2007 / April 2007 / May 2007 / June 2007 / July 2007 / August 2007 /
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"Keep fighting for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce." -- Molly Ivins, 1944-2007
"The penalty good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men."
-- Plato
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