Thursday, January 06, 2005
Exams cause deaths of grannies
We now have scientific proof that an upcoming exam in college causes the death of grannies. Especially if the student currently has an "F" in the course.
The most realistic solution to the murder of family members by exams (only allow orphans to enroll in college) was discarded as unworkable due to the shortage of orphans. The other possible solutions (keep secret the fact that the student is at college, eliminate exams altogether) were discarded as unworkable due to the difficulty of teenagers keeping anything secret, and the economic effects of discarding exams, which would cause the collapse of the paper industry (amongst others).
In other news, t-shirts at work cause Fridays. I know this because every time I wear a t-shirt to work, it is Friday, with a 100% correlation rate. Remember, correlation = causation, that is a fundamental law of statistics!
- Badtux the Snarky Penguin
Posted by: BadTux / 1/06/2005 01:16:00 PM
- Name: BadTux
- Location: Some iceberg, South Pacific, Antarctica
I am a black and white and yellow multicolored penguin making his way as best he can in a world of monochromic monkeys.
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Bill Richardson: Because what America needs is a competent fat man with bad hair as President (haven't we had enough incompetent pretty faces?)
Cost of the War in Iraq